Today I finally finished the laundry, dusted around the fireplace, went through the stack of papers that have been piling up for months and I thought to myself, why is it that I am still trying to recover from the holidays?
There was so much good wrapped up in those endless days of celebration…but there was also so much of the unexpected.
It left me a little off balance.
And that imbalance has haunted me this past few weeks, following me around, dragging at my enthusiasm for greeting each day.
I will be honest, it worried me a little until I remembered a favorite quote, from a favorite author, of a favorite book. A brilliant woman whose influence molded my life as a young mother, her whispers still carry me through…
She said, “I have this theory that everybody is born with a whole set of ‘blocks’ in their personalities ––all different colors and shapes––but they each have their own individual set, and it’s theirs for a lifetime. Then, as we live, we shape those blocks into a certain pattern, and for a time that pattern is fairly stable. Then something comes along, like adolescence, or graduation, or a mission ––some big change–– and it’s as if all of our blocks get knocked down, and we have to build up our ‘personhood’ again. In a sense, I guess we change, because we usually build a new pattern ––and maybe a new block comes out on top. But we are still building with the same basic blocks. So, in answer to you question, I don’t think you’ve basically changed. I just think someone has knocked down your blocks.” (Jaroldeen Edwards)
That is exactly what happened to me this month.
Somebody knocked down my blocks.
You know, somehow just knowing that made me feel better.
Because I don’t mind building. I love to create. To see something begin to take shape.
But this time I am going to do things a little differently.
I am going to turn the process over to the Lord.
I’m going to let Him architect the design.
I’m going to begin each day with the whisper of a prayer, “Work in me according to thy will.”
“Perform your good work in me…”
I am going to trust Him to design a new pattern.
I am going to trust Him.
I woke up today to the sun and I knew right away…
it was going to be a good day for building.